In our Strange Love… comic, we re-examined what it is to love and be loved in return. I don’t know about you, but I haven’t felt loved by the DC Cinematic Universe lately. Were you ever a kid and really wanted some Pokemon cards? And you begged and you cried for those cards until finally, Christmas came, and you open up a box of Digimon.

In this analogy, Suicide Squad is the Digimon.

Today I came across a strange creature; one that I didn’t believe existed in the real world. As I sat in the Bob Evans waiting area I saw a gentleman with a grey ponytail in a nautical shirt sidle up to the Host Stand and ask where he was in line. His name? I’m glad you asked, because it was Snake.

If this was the end to my time with Snake, I could have lived my life normally, but it was not to be. A few moments later I thought I heard my name called, and I could almost taste my Country Fried Steak & Eggs. The hostess did not declare “Nick, party of 2” however, instead she stated “Snake, party of 2”

“You don’t look like a Snake!” Snake said with a wry smile, “But I do!”

I admitted that this was true and sat back down to wait my turn as Snake marched with his ladyfriend, no doubt practiced in the ways of the Snake, to their booth destination. Eventually my name was called and I sat at my own table, but while ordering noticed that Snake had been beckoned by a staff member into the kitchen. What was going on with Snake? Was he a supplier of some illicit Biscuits and Gravy-based substance? Was he being taken to the management to declare himself the one true Snake King of Grits? I would never know.

It was after our meal that I conclude this tale. I wished to take a picture of Snake enjoying his meal but was discouraged my girlfriend. As any surreptitious picture would no doubt be snuffed out by Snake, along with my life. I was dismayed that I would not have any souvenir to remember Snake by, until I came across the majesty that was his Hyundai Elantra.


Godspeed Snake, you Glorious Enigma.